Choices We Make
by tisatenn2005
Summary: Bella chose Edward. Lies, Hate, Regret. Was she wrong? Can she fix the mistakes she made?
1. Chapter 1

Reality is a cold dead thing….

BPOV:

"Edward please…"

The darkness was closing in making it hard to think as the burning searing pain coursed it's way through my body. My sobs turned to screams of agony, the tears freezing on their path down my chilly frozen cheeks. Nothing was as it should be.

I trusted you! I shouted in my mind over and over as it all blurred together the life I was so sure I would have. The perfect frozen life forever young, and beautiful, forever in love. Lies..

It was all lies..

Pain, that was the world I had made for myself. As the agony again tore through me. Pain for the choices I had made. Pain for the hurt I caused those around me. Stubborn oh I was so stubborn and sure I was right in my choice. Regret filled my mouth with it's acidic bitter taste.

Now I lived in the pain, in the frozen scorching pain that was my reality. As the veil of confusion was lifted the shroud removed from my eyes and the light of my new dawn sank in I could see it for what it was. Lies.. Foolish stupid girl am I.

"This is what you wanted." His dark voice broke through to me.

Yes. It is had been what I wanted. And for that choice I was being punished.

"Hate you.." I spat out before I was lost again to the screams of torment.

My pain was solace to me now, the one thing I had to remind me that I was alive. The one thing that forced me to admit I was wrong. I picked wrong..

As the darkness lapped at me flicks of its cat like tongue stroking my numbed flesh lick, lap, flick after sandpapery stroke. Teasing me with the dimming edges of my vision oh so deliciously close to oblivion and yet so far from my reach.

Let me die I begged that darkness take me away from this nothingness this lie that I foolishly placed all my dreams, and hopes in.

Days, weeks, months, years? Time traveled in this wicked place unseen the burning the red deep silky death that was now my forever. The dark my true home, the light forever extinguished as the faded silhouette of my one ray of sunshine dimmed for me with the reality of what I had allowed myself to become.

"Jacob.." I felt the sting of sharp hurt as my skin now hardened cracked and shattered with the blows that fell.

"Never again!" He shouted his words jumbled in my mind. Nothing made sense, when I grasped the world I once new by the edges it was soundly taken away replaced by the burning searing pain of my reality with Edward.

"You belong to me!" His hard cold voice rang clear as the burning in my throat tore me from the world again as his fist fell over, and over and I lost the will to count the blows.

Huddled in the corner my face buried in my hair as it matted around my shoulders in long dirty tangles I listened. The pain of my hunger soaring to a new high. How long? I tried to relate time the passing of minutes, hours? I had no sense of it or of myself I knew only Edward. He owned me, fed me, kept me and I hated him. He was the devil in my never ending hell.

"You can't keep doing this Edward!"

"Get the fuck out!" "She is mine."

"She's wasting away to nothing. She has to feed!"

The pain of my hunger grew stronger at those words. My cracked dry tongue scraped over my stone lips but no moisture could be found no reprieve. Just my empty painful nothingness.

The cramps came crashing in, as my hunger now heightened. Would I never die ever when starved? Oh.. How I wished I would wither away to the join the floating dust particles flickering in the light that peaked through the crack in the heavy drapes.

The creak of the door brought me back from the void. The light spilled in stinging my eyes causing me to hiss. Mad.. I was going mad from starvation. Growling low as the scent of blood hit my senses. More pain would come as he would kneel just out of reach. He would place the animal before me, and drink that hot wet life watching as I died a little more inside.

"Isabella."

The name registered faintly in my fogged brain before it slipped away as the red clouded my vision. Feed.

When I next opened my eyes I was not surprised to find the red haze that clouded my vision this time it was more than ever before, yet somehow I was less. Less confused, less hungry. Flashes of cognition skipped across my brain. The blood that splashed the wall, as it slid slowly down my bare skin. The scent of copper and musk as I got my first real taste of my own horror.

Monster. Vampire. The things of scary nightmares, what made small children afraid to look in their closets at night. I was that thing.

Placing my hands on the ground I rose slowly weakly to my feet. The sun was shining all around me the grass green littered with hundreds of colorful flowers all laughing at me. Those scattered colors made things seem normal in their bright beauty in this fake reality where I was free of him.

I wandered unsure sticking to the woods, afraid of each noise. Jumping and startling at any sound. The longer I walked the more sure I became that somehow I was free of him. For this moment in time I was free.

With that wonderful thought came the reality of my situation crashing in with the weight of the world. He would come, he would be angry, and I would pay.

I walked faster stumbling in my weakened state.

Safety, I needed to hide to get away.

The sun laid itself to rest, as did the moon. Falling and rising in succession over and over and still I walked. One thing kept my feet moving. One word held hope for me, Jacob.

JPOV:

I woke to the light streaming through my window. Instantly alert to danger. My skin crawling with the need to phase. Something was wrong. Springing to my feet I pushed open the window and jumped over the sill.

Lifting my head I listened searching my senses for some sign.

Yes, something was wrong it was much to quiet no sounds of birds in the early morning light. Phasing I took to the trees seeking my brothers one by one.

Our minds linked at once, each of us feeling the same sense of dread. We came together in the meadows clearing all of us tuned in to one another.

"What is it Jacob?" Paul sent the question to me his hackles raised ready for action.

"I am not sure. I would say vampire, but I don't smell anything. We patrol, Seth, Quill your with me. Paul take Leah, and Embry and go south. Call if you find anything."

We parted moving in unison one fluid massive hunting party. If a vampire was here I would take great pleasure in ripping the bastard to bits. Maybe I would even get so lucky as to come across one of them…

We patrolled the Quileute land for hours finding nothing. Searched the boundaries and still nothing yet. I couldn't erase the unease I felt. When the moon was high above us and the fog snaked it way through the trees I stopped running.

"Lets head home Jacob, whatever is out there can wait until morning." Embry said.

"He's right man, lets head home. We will pick up at first light." Paul echoed with his own desire to rest.

"Fine," I started to agree when a snap sounded like gunfire through the night. The crack of a twig as I whipped around to face the enemy only to stop as I was jolted into the past.

Long dark hair cascading down slim perfect shoulders as she smiled over her fathers shoulder. Tears in her eyes tears of happiness. Hugging Charlie goodbye those deep brown eyes meeting mine in sorrow and perhaps regret as she mouthed her goodbye to me before stepping into the car and forever out of my life.

"Holy fuck man is that?" Seth whined in shock.

Jolted back to the here and now, I came face to face with the nightmare I had always feared. Bella, but not my Bell's no this thing was the hollowed out version of what he had made her. She stood pale, and weak supporting her weight on the tree. Her eyes hidden from me by tangled masses of knotted hair.

The fog parted slightly as the air shifted and carried the bloody scent of her sickly vampire stench to me.

I stepped to the side moving away from the smell as the shell of my dream girl crashed to her knees hissing low. Her head snapping up to reveal… big brown eyes.

"Jake man what do we do here?" Paul growled as she hissed. I was the leader the alpha who would protect the pack. I had sworn to protect the tribe with my very life. Would I do that? Protect them now, even against her?

"Wait, we don't know anything yet, her eyes are brown Jacob. Maybe they didn't turn her." Seth said hopefully even as his mind betrayed his doubt to us all.

"We kill it Jacob!" Leah hissed as she advanced.

I watched as if in slow motion as Leah moved in her massive form crouched low looking to strike.

Looming over her as she knelt her eyes glistening with unshed tears those brown bottomless pits staring past her death to seek me out. Her hiss and cry of anger sounding more like pain as she shivered and dug her fingers into the wet earth.

The power behind the strike was undeniable as Leah shot forward for the kill. One word broke the night in that moment.. "Jake". Her soft whisper torn past my hard exterior. Just as she fell under the weight of the giant wolf it's teeth finding their mark in her stone flesh.


	2. Chapter 2

The compulsion to STOP! Roared through me stronger than any I had ever ordered. Something I had sworn to never do. Never would I force any of my pack to follow an order from me. The moment it was done the regret focused on the edge of thought. It flickered and was gone instantly replaced by the focus of my despair.

Bella, lay broken on the ground Leah's jaws hovering a breathe above her shattered form. The chalked powder on the ground around her melted into the wet soil to create some morbid outline like from a twisted crime scene I never wanted to be witness to.

I moved phasing as I approached fear for my own safety washed away by my fear for her. "Bell', I choked the words from my dry throat.

Her eyes flicked open to again reveal the brown pools that I had missed more than I cared to admit. Her lips moved but no sound broke the quiet.

"I'm here Bell's. I got you." I promised cursing the hold she had on me even as I again swore myself to the pain of holding out for Bella Swan. No Cullen now, she was married. At that thought I cringed away from her slightly and her eyes again filled with tears and her head turned to hide her pain.

I could see the large gaping hole Leah's teeth had made already healing knitting together. The growls around me started in earnest as I moved sliding one arm under Bella's legs and the other behind her back. Lifting her slowly to cradle her chilled form against my own heated flesh.

"Jacob?" Seth had phased in order to speak to me, the fear in his voice evident.

"I don't know Seth. I just can't leave her this way." I said as honestly as I could.

With those words the pack parted the way, and followed me back home. Walking with me, even with the doubts they held, even knowing that I wasn't sure that I was doing the right thing. They stood by me one unified front.

One strong unit until I reached the village, and walked into the clearing. At which point the parted like the limbs of the willow tree under a strong breeze. Each of them moving towards their own homes, and the lives they left waiting.

"Dad!" I shouted as I pushed the front door open.

"Jake, did you find the threat?" He yelled back as the squeak of his chair made its was from the kitchen into the living room.

I laid her gently on the couch just as my father caught sight of her. "Holy Christ! Is that Bella Swan?"

"Dad I don't have any answers. She just showed up looking like this."

"Get hot water, and a rag some soap. She's covered in blood. Wait.. Jake she's been turned you know that right?" He asked as he moved to lift one bloody lump of hair from her face.

"I know it. But dad, she is still in there. I saw it right before Leah went for the kill."

After explaining how we found her, we finished cleaning the blood from her face as best we could. I knew vampires didn't sleep so she was aware of what we were doing. She never spoke her eyes staying closed flinching away from us a few times only calmed by my fathers voice as he sung to her in his soft baritone.

I sat all night across from her waiting for her to move, as the dawn crept on the horizon her eyes finally opened and I felt shock at the red burning away the brown. Reminding me that this thing may have once been my best friend but now she was something else entirely.

"Bella what happened to you?" I asked unable to stand the quiet any longer. Her eyes flicked to the side and back again the only reaction to my question. " Where are the Cullen's?"

She moved so quickly that I couldn't help the growl that ripped from my chest. My instincts coming to the fore as I felt the quickening in my skin. I took a deep calming breath as she knelt in the corner whimpering low in her throat.

"Bella." I whispered softly as I crept in her direction.

Reaching out I touched the back of one shaking shoulder which brought forth a wail of desperation. "Jesus Bell's what is wrong with you?" I roared only causing her to sink lower into herself as she became as small a target as she possibly could.

Someone had hurt her this much was clear. Backing off to give her space I moved across the room watching her sob silently. Her body moving slightly with wracking sobs.

Unable to watch any longer I stormed from the house, walking then running stretching my legs to their max as I sped forward. Not stopping until my hand bled red and the splintered wood shattered under my fist.

"What the fuck Jacob, your going to wake the girls." Sam shouted as he opened the busted door.

"Sam, Bella is back she showed up last night covered in blood wearing the exact same clothes she left in 3 years ago her eyes they were brown but now this morning red and I tried to talk to her she well she is a vampire and something happened I don't know what but someone hurt her she is afraid of me of everything I .. Maybe Emily could." Finally forced to pause for air I stopped ranting.

"Jacob calm down. You mean to tell me that you brought a vampire onto the reservation, and you left said crazy, and possibly disturbed vampire at home in the house with your father while her eyes are red, and she is possibly hungry?" Sam roared.

Not bothering to answer I turned running back to whatever disaster waited me for yet another stupid decision I had made.

Bursting into the house I stopped at the sound of my father shouting over the sound of the shower. "Bella there is a clean towel on the lid of the toilet. And I put some of Rachel's clothing out for you as well."

I watched my dad wheel out of the bathroom, and make his way to the kitchen. "Jake you need to go to John over at the meat shop. The girl is hungry the red is growing, have him get you some blood maybe she will take it. I don't know otherwise she will have to leave to hunt. I am sure that after 3 years she knows enough to feed herself."

I stood listening to my father and the matter of fact way that he was handling the situation.

"Go on boy get." He waved his hands at me as if to shoo me away.

Bella Pov:

The steaming hot shower had worked it's way across my skin and gradually into my mind helping to erase the confusion. I looked around me through that steam at the cold white tile, at the array of shampoos, and conditioners. This was real.

I had escaped somehow, although it was still confusing I was free. Here on the reservation in the home of Jacob Black. The one place that I had a chance. If I was to stay free if I had any hope of making a clean break it would be here on the reservation surrounded by these wolves.

Lathering the thick soap again through my hair I watched as the red thickness now turned to a softer pink as it poured from my hair. Rinse, and repeat this mundane action seemed so normal that it sprouted forth hope eternal in me.

Doing something so regular made me feel home, something I hadn't felt in so long that I had forgotten all about it. The water ran clear now the blood erased the evidence of the monster lingering under the newly scrubbed surface gone now. Turning off the water I stepped out of the shower wrapping the towel around myself.

Smoothing my hair back I rubbed my hand over the fogged mirror and stared at the person in front of me. I looked hard not sure what I had been expecting, only to find that I looked like me. This was the first time I had seen myself since Ed. Since he had turned me. Staring deeper into the mirror I saw the pain, and the horror of what my reality had cost me.

He had been right all along. He was soulless, and now I was too. The red eyes glaring at me from inside the mirror echoed the blood that would forevermore stain my hands.

"Bell's it's Jake can you come out here please?" His voice broke me from my gloomy thoughts as I turned and dressed in a flurry of motion. The jeans fell loosely on my hips so I rolled them once, and pulled the shirt over my pale form.

Opening the door I made my way slowly into the kitchen where I could hear Jacob, and his father waiting for me. They would have questions, did I have answers? Could I tell them what I had become could I admit to the sun that I was the darkness that swallowed him whole?

I stopped to wipe at the single frosted tear that threatened to spill forth. My dripping hair wetting my shirt with tiny drops those drips of dampness would act as my tears falling and drying my sins laid bare for once he knew he would make me leave.

My head falling in shame I walked into the room. Jacob pulled a chair out for me, and I sat down nodding my thank you.

"Bella you need to feed, I went to the Butchers I don't know if this will work but I got a pint of pigs blood I was hoping to make this easy on you. Maybe you know if you can drink it this way. Or if we need to heat it up first…" Jake was rambling. His soft heart going so far as to feed the beast that was once his friend.

"Thank you." I rasped out.

Jacob's eyes shot to mine stunned at the sound of my voice. He sat the white lidded container down on the table before me, and I reached out to give his rough tanned hand a gentle squeeze as I took the cup from him.

Lifting the lid I looked at the thick coagulated clotting mess inside, and still my hunger spiked. The few times that I had fed in the past had been less than graceful, and the thought of lifting this cup to my lips in front of these people so connected to the me of the past caused me to set the cup down sloshing the liquid inside and spilling it over my long white fingers.

"Bella, you have to eat. Please don't be embarrassed." Billy spoke softly reassuring me.

"I.." Stopping short I simply watched the blood drying on my white skin, and I lifted those fingers to lick the liquid slowly from my hand.

As the flavor hit my tongue I was taken over, lifting the cup in a flourish I downed it in deep large gulps. The thick mess causing me to choke and sputter, still I swallowed it down.

A knock sounded at the door before Sam walked inside. He moved to the table his eyes fixed on mine.

"What is going on here?" He asked staring at the cup now empty in my hands.

"We are just trying to feed Bella." Jake answered him.

"What is she a pet now?" Sam asked with a laugh. I couldn't stop the glare that shot his direction as he snickered. His hands lifted quickly in surrender as he moved closer. "Whoa now little vampire. I come in peace."

For good measure I hissed at him snapping my teeth. When he jumped I smiled widely in Jake's direction. In that moment I was Bella Swan again. For just a second I lived in the reality of the choice I should have made. Of the man I should have chosen.

"Bell's?" Jake called my name.

Turning my head towards him I watched the room spin and tumble the walls waved and swayed as I crashed to the floor. My stomach heaving it's anger as I spewed forth the contents. Over and over I heaved removing the blood from my system.

"What is wrong with her?"

"What did you feed her?"

"Butchers Blood!"

"Its dead blood, she cant have dead blood."

I listened to them shouting around me back and forth as I finally expelled the last of the blood from my system. I felt weaker than before. Weaker and off balance as if I was wading through sand underwater. Yet I was sitting still on the floor,

"Why would you give her dead blood?"

"Don't you know anything about vampires?"

"Bella, why would you drink that when it's sure to make you sick?"

The shouting continued as I moved my hands over my ears the screaming now raging causing my head to split open and spill forth. "I didn't know!" I screamed and finally everyone was quiet.


	3. Chapter 3

JPOV:

Bella stood and raced from the room, straight out the kitchen door. Her long dark hair steaming behind her. I jumped to my feet and glared at Sam, and my dad. "Will she be okay?"

Sam stood nodding his head. "She will be fine once she feeds. You need to find her Jacob take her hunting. Phase show her how we do it in wolf form. I cant explain it but I don't think she knows how to feed herself."

With those words I raced after her following the scent of my old spice body wash into the woods.

I found her without to much effort her unique scent mingled with my own body wash was an easy trail to follow. Not to mention Bella hadn't even tried to cover her tracks. She had run for about 2 miles into the trees stopping by a small creek. She sat still on a mossy log one hand dipped below the frosty water.

"I'm so sorry Jake. I should have told you…" She whispered her eyes cast downward with a look of shame.

"Bell's I want to know everything, and eventually I will have to know, but right now. Let leave it as this. It's obvious that you don't know anything about hunting, and feeding. Lets take this one thing at a time, right now you, and I are going to hunt." I spoke to her with a calm reassuring voice hoping to make her more comfortable and less ashamed.

I watched as her eyes lifted and she stood in one fluid motion. Nodding she took a few steps closer to me, and I smiled backing away.

"Don't be afraid Bell's, but I am going to phase. The thought of hunting is still hard in my wolf form but no way and I going to snack on the local wildlife this way. So I will phase, and you just follow my lead. We will take it slow and see if your instincts take over." With those words I burst through my skin and landed smoothly on all fours.

I half expected Bella to be afraid of me, but I should have known better. If anything she seemed to be more comfortable with me now. I turned giving her a silly wink which I wasn't sure she would see in this form, before turning to lead the hunt.

I couldn't the freedom I felt in my wolf form. Nothing could compare to the speed, and strength that coursed through me when I let the spirit take over. I was still me, Jacob Black. But, so much more and it was a light freeing feeling.

In this moment I was alive running through the trees excited to be phased for enjoyment. When I found myself in this form it normally led to vampires or some other form of danger. I heard a light snap to my right, as Bella moved to run along side me.

I sped up pushing myself to my max, thinking it was time to test her see what she was made of. I forced my legs to lengthen and gave it all I had soon my massive muscles burned and Bella still ran at my side although she too seemed to strain harder.

Cutting left I slowed tracking the scent of a herd of deer. Gradually gaining on them as Bella took the lead her focus intent she seemed to forget I was here as she hunted. Her hair flew loose behind her as she weaved, ducked and sprang through the undergrowth.

I stopped watching as she leapt over a downed tree and for a split second it seemed she took flight as she soared nimbly over the tree and glided back to the earth softly soundlessly. Then she was in action again breaking into the undergrowth and out of my sight.

I moved to catch up when I heard a faint thud and then quiet. I stalked slowly not wanting to startle Bella as I came up on her, and the large buck laying stiffly in her arms its legs kicking each blow causing me to wince as it struck her small chest over and over. I watched in morbid fascination as she the buck stopped struggling, and Bella fed.

Watching her drink I phased back pulling on my shorts just as Bella finished her meal and stood. She gently laid the buck on the ground and turned to face me. Her features seemed stronger now, her hair shone with a new healthy glow, her skin less pale now almost appearing flushed.

"Feeling better?" I asked.

"I guess I can at least feed myself. That's something right?" She said with a slight shrug to her shoulders.

"Jakes I know you have questions, I just.. I'm not ready for you to know.." She stopped her eyes again falling away from mine.

"Bella, I don't know what you think is so bad that you cant tell me. For now I will leave it, even though it kills me to wait. I will however tell you that I am still your friend even now I cant hate you."

"Oh Jake, you will.." Her eyes found mine again now full of unshed tears.

I moved towards her not thinking just acting jerking her into my arms and holding her tightly. I wanted to make the last three years go away. To bring back the easy banter, and comfortable way we had with one another. I needed to make her break free of this odd meager attitude she now had.

"I want my Bell's back." I whispered into her hair.

Bella jerked from my hold as if I had slapped her. Then glared at me, "She's dead. You need to hear that to understand that girl is dead and gone. I am nothing, a monster… He turned me! I am nothing do you hear me I am the .. The Darkness!" She screamed the last words as she backed a few steps away.

"Bella Swan." I roared right back at her. "You are Bella Swan! You may be a bloodsucker now, but your still my Bell's." I ran my hand through my hair in frustration as she shook her head in denial. "Stubborn stupid girl, you never listen to anyone…" I ranted.

A gasp fell from her lips and I stopped yelling. Looking at her now I knew I had crossed some strange invisible line, as the tears fell down her cheeks in slow icy streaks.

BPOV:

His words fell like and axe to my shattered heart. How many times had I said those very words to myself. Somewhere inside I felt the old me trigger, and want to argue it's side. I closed her off shut her up she wasn't allowed to speak.

Then I snapped my head up at what I was doing. This was not Edward. Jacob was not him he wouldn't force me to be docile to cower. I stood here having fed fully for the first time in three years all because this was Jacob and I was free. I was safe I had escaped. I was still inside this shell, and this person this man before me didn't want to kill that voice.

I could yell, scream, shout! I could be the old me, monster and girl all in one with him. Jacob wouldn't hurt me.. Wouldn't hurt me. "Wont hurt me."

I shouted the words over and over like a mantra to myself. Forcing my brain to let the real me out. I was not weak, I was free, I was safe, and I would never go back again. I had a different choice now, a chance to go back and right the wrong.

"Bella I swear I wont hurt you. I am so sorry I shouted at you." Jake was saying softly his hands lifted in a meek manner as he backed away slowly.

He thought I was afraid of him. "Oh Jake." I sobbed out the words and threw myself forward between those open arms and knocked him off balance. Crashing to the ground his back slammed hard and I landed firmly on top of him my head resting on his chest.

Once the shock of my move wore off I felt his arms close around me as he held me tight. Funny now that I was in his arms, I took a moment to realize that he didn't hate me, my Jake. I took a deep breathe and sighed. He didn't smell like Edward had claimed his scent would be. The wolf smell was not off putting instead he smelt musty, and warm. I breathed deeply enjoying the feeling of being home. Thinking aloud I asked, "Do I smell bad? Like other vampires do to you?"

A short laugh as I moved out of those strong arms. "No Bell's you smell just fine." "Are you feeling okay? I didn't mean to say something to upset you. I just don't like this new side of you that cowers and acts all meek. You have always been the one to call me on my shit."

Taking a deep calming and unnecessary breath I took his hand and started walking. I needed to move to think about each step I took in order to distract myself from what I had say.

"When we left Forks, we went to a small island. Esme's Island actually. It was more beautiful than anything I had ever seen. I was happy. I hadn't had time to miss Charlie or you or anyone. I was so sure I had made the right choice. He asked me if I was ready, and foolish stupid Bella I jumped at the thought that this was it he was going to make love to me, and hold me and turn me and we would live happily ever after."

Jacob's grip tightened on mine, but he said nothing just kept walking at my side.

"Well.. He turned me just as I asked him to, and once the pain was finally over I expected to be some crazed blood hungry thing unable to think acting on instinct. It was what he had told me would happen. " I paused thinking back to how shocked I had been when I opened my new vampire eyes, and was assaulted with hunger. I had expected the worse until I realized that I was thinking logically thinking and fearing my behavior. That was when I had realized.

"It wasn't the truth. I was me Jake. I was aware of everything. Edward seemed shocked that I could rationalize, and got angry when he couldn't read my mind even though I was a vampire. I tried to comfort him, to tell him that it was me not him." I stopped walking as we reached the edge of the trees walking out over the cliffs that had almost been my death so many years ago. To bad I hadn't drowned under those crashing waves.

Jacob cleared his throat, and I kept going. "Edward wasn't what I had believed. He had some strange ability as a vampire to compel me. I think its something all vampires are able to do. Maybe to help them lure their human prey. I was so sure before I had been turned that I was in love with him, but when I tried to ask Edward about the way I was feeling. About how he seemed different to me he snapped. He became something I never thought he could. Cold, hard like the monster I begged him to make me."

I shook my head when Jacob moved closer to me looking to comfort me.

"No. You may not want to hear this, and I wont give you more information than you need. I will just say that he never was the one. I was wrong a stupid stubborn girl just like you said, and I choose him when it was always … When I was wrong, and now I have paid for that with my soul. I don't know anything about taking care of myself or what I can do as a vampire other than what he told me before I was turned and I don't know how much of that is true. I hate him Jacob for things I will never tell you, but as your friend I will warn you… You should send me away. I wont leave unless you ask me. I cant I am to afraid to even be alone for a second, but he will come for me. And people will die, and once again I am putting you in danger."

Once the words started I let them slip out needing for once in my life to be honest about how selfish I was, and in this I was oh so selfish. I would place my dearest friend in danger because I was afraid. Still I wouldn't leave unless he asked it. My form was frozen with fear waiting for the words to come that would send me out on my own.

I should have known better than think he would ask it of me, "Bella I will protect you. The pack is strong, and we will guard you, and keep you safe. I promise it."

"Yo! Jake. We were coming to check on you. We figured you for dead what with you running off with the bloodsucker all alone." Paul shouted as he caught sight of us just inside the trees.

I watched Jake quickly hid a smile when I hissed. "Don't worry Bell's he is just the same ole Paul ever the jackass with his foot in his mouth."

"I am going to head back to your place, and give you two some pack time." Turning towards Paul I couldn't help the words that spilled out of my mouth, "Just so you know Paul, Jake's not the one who needs to worry about me getting hungry. I prefer my meals with a little more meat in the middle." For good measure I tapped his rock hard abs one time before moving away.

"Jake! Did she just call me fat, and threaten to eat me?" Paul asked his voice pitching on the high end.

I snickered slightly, and singing softly let my voice carry back to them, "Who's afraid of the big bad wolf?"

Yes, I was feeling better the blood had helped restore me, and letting go by telling Jacob the truth had helped to lift the weight from my shoulders. I really and truly had a chance here with him by my side maybe I could find a place in the world again.


	4. Chapter 4

JPOV:

I laughed out loud enjoying the levity of the moment. Bella seemed to be feeling better if her jab at Paul was any indication, and Paul's face well that was a treat all its own. Suddenly the day felt lighter and things didn't look so doomed.

"So what now?" Paul growled when I stopped laughing.

"Now? I guess now I go meet with the elders and let them know I have offered Bella the packs protection."

"You what?" Paul asked in surprise.

"What I mean to say is I will die to protect her Paul. I wont force any of you to stand with me against the Cullen's. I will take her and leave if that is what needs to happen. Sam can take Alpha back. You know me Paul, I would never put anyone on the Rez in danger, but I have to protect her."

Paul shook his head, and sighed, "Well I guess we should get everyone together with the Elders, and see where this day takes us then."

I watched my friend walk to the edge of the cliff and look down at the cold crashing waves. "Just so you know. I hate vampires, and I enjoy killing them… but you are my alpha, and my friend. So I guess if your going down I am stupid enough to go with you." With those words he leapt free of the ledge and was swallowed by the water below.

Taking a second I looked out over the water into the blue sky that was rare around here, and held out hope that it was a sign. Leaping out I followed Paul into the water and off to face the others.

"You did what?" Leah screamed, jumping to her feet and glaring at me.

"You will stay calm or be removed from the circle." Sam said from his new seat with the Elders.

With a huff Leah turned to glare at Sam, "Don't bother I will remove myself." "Stupid men in this pack always thinking with their dicks." With that she stormed from the hut leaving us sitting in silence.

"Jacob has given us all the information he has. It is clear that the girl has been turned. She is a vampire and as such an enemy of the people." Sue said her eyes full of sorrow, and pain.

"It's true she has been turned, it is also clear that the girl was lied to, and tricked. She has said she does not wish to be with the others. As a human she was a great friend of the tribe with many of our own children." My father said in defense of Bella.

"It brings danger to our door. Are we foolish enough to risk the lives of those very children now for one girl?" Sue slung the words at Billy.

"Stop!" Sam said with irritation. "This is not a decision to be made by us. The lives in danger are the ones that will decide the girls fate with the tribe. It is clear where Leah's vote rests. Now we will hear from the others. At which point the decision will be final, and we will all abide it."

I swallowed the hard lump that choked my throat. As each member of my pack was called before the council.

"Seth come forward." Sue called to her son. "What would you have?"

Seth turned to look at me before speaking. "Bella was, and is my friend. She has never done anything more than be kind to me. Until she does, even now as a vampire I wont turn my back on her. I vote she stays."

He moved back as Sam called another member up the another. Each of them agreeing that they would allow Bella to stay on the reservation. I stood unable to contain my emotions hugging my pack, my friends for their support. Each man who stood with me had a family to defend, and Bella was part of that family for them now as well.

"Thank you all so much."

"Yeah so well lets head to your place, and give the bloodsucker the news." Paul said with a slap to my back.

"If something happens it will be on your head Jacob Black." Sue Clearwater said tears in her eyes.

"Sue, the girl is not at fault for your husbands death. Bella loved him like we all did." My dads words rang clear and true as we left the hut.

The mood was light as we made out way to my house. The guys bantering easily between themselves about how they all planned to teach Bella how to be a vampire.

"I wonder if she can outrun Leah."

"Well I don't think that Leah will be looking to race her anytime soon. "

Walking up to the house I saw Bella sitting on the porch steps her eyes catching mine once again brown, even though they appeared large and worried. She knew we had voted and she worried.

"So vampire girl, I guess you get to hang out with us for awhile." Quill said with a snicker as we stopped in front of her.

"The pack voted. We will stay here." I explained.

"We?" She asked.

"Please Bella, like Jake would ever let us kick you out and not follow you. " Embry laughed.

Bella stood up and stepped down off the porch grabbing me in a hard hug. Before taking her lower lip between her teeth as she looked over at my brothers.

"Please like you don't want to get your hands on this fine body. Come on then get some love." Embry said and he grabbed her in a hug lifting her and spinning her once.

Bella laughed as her feet touched the ground and Seth moved to hug her, before Quill shoved him out of the way.

"Whoa! I think maybe you filled out a little bit up top when you changed." Quill laughed when Bella kicked him in the shin before shyly shoving a strand of hair behind her ear. While I punched Quill soundly in the shoulder.

"So." Paul said. "We have a bet going on how strong you are Bella. Its not like its everyday we can test out a young vampire. Show us what you got bloodsucker."

"I um, well what did you have in mind?" Bella asked.

"Jake said your fast. I got ten bucks says you can't beat me to the cliffs." Embry said throwing out the gauntlet.

"And if I beat you?" She asked a smile crossing her face.

"When you lose then you will.. You have to streak through the village naked." Quill chimed in.

Bella didn't look the least bit surprised that my idiot friends would ask this of her, "Fine same thing applies when you lose to me. No wait, that's to easy for you boys who spend half your time naked. No you will have wear a dress for the rest of the day."

"Jake you start the race, Seth take off now you judge the winner." Paul said as he moved to take his place in the race. "I want in on this."

Once Seth was out of view and my brothers had phased I looked to Bella who nodded once to signal she was ready.

BPOV:

I waited for the signal, no way was I going to loose this race. I was sure earlier with Jacob that I could outrun him so surely I was faster than the others. Jacob moved raising his arm above his head I nodded once before his arm fell.

The wolves around me sprang into action their massive forms breaking ahead before I moved. Ugh so much for my vampire reflexes. Determined I focused and sprang forth. I ran, and wow I was fast I caught them easily without effort each wolf huffing loudly as they sprinted to the cliffs. We covered the ground their paws pounding and shaking the earth, as my feet almost floated across them. I passed Embry first with a tug on his tail. His teeth snapped at my butt when I moved around him.

Coming up on Paul next I laughed when he tripped up slightly on the mossy foliage. Right ahead was Quill, and I pushed off my back foot which propelled me into the air and over his head to land about ten feet ahead of him. I was so focused on the race and the thrill of my speed that I smiled when I passed Seth in victory. Only to shoot right off the edge of the cliff and down to the icy water below.

I hit the water with a smack, breaking the surface and sinking. The last time I had jumped I had enjoyed it until the water took over. This time I was strong the swirling current, nothing against my own power as I kicked easily upward breaking the surface with a laugh.

"Are you crazy?"

I turned to the screaming voice finding Jacob in the water with me his cheeks red with anger. As he swam towards me. The others all in the water as well.

"I didn't see Seth." I laughed again at the fact that I must surely be the only vampire in the world who would fall off a cliff.

"Only you!" Jacob joined in laughing as we swam to shore.

"What did you think that being a vampire you could turn into a bat and fly away?" Seth asked when we all made shore.

"I guess that's an idea." I laughed back at him.

Standing in the bright sunlight that was breaking the clouds I attempted to wring the water from my shirt now clinging like a second skin. Giving up on the shirt I shook the water from my hair before I noticed how quiet everyone around me was.

I looked up to see I was the focus of everyone's attention. "Do you mind?" I asked embarrassed crossing my arms over my chest.

"Its not.. That is to say your." Jake stumbled over the words.

"Damn Bella, you're a babe. If he wont say it I will. You filled out some since we last saw you. Your not skin, and bones anymore, and that freaky sparkle thing suits you." Embry admitted.

Reaching my hand out I saw that I was in fact sparkling just like Ed… That is like vampires did. I had yet to see myself in the light and it was strange to think that I looked like this. "Yea well what can I say Bella the portable disco ball at your service."

"Mmm Mm, so Bella what you got planned for the rest of the day?" Paul asked with a mischievous smirk that gained him a growl from Jacob.

"I have plans with you of course." I smiled slyly.

Jacob whipped his head in my direction and I almost lost my cool. Paul lit up like a candle his eyes smoldering in response. I walked closer to him running my fingers over his bare chest checking him out slowly.

"Like what you see?" He asked with pride.

"Oh yes." I purred.

Another growl from Jake, and I figured this game was going to end badly if I didn't make my point. "I do like what I see, and I can just picture it now dressed in pink frills running all over the reservation." I giggled as his face fell and I stepped back from his naked chest with a evil wink at the others.

"You didn't win." Embry chimed in.

"Yea the race was a draw, seeing as how you fell off the cliff and we all dove in to save you." Quill agreed.

"Oh whatever you bunch of sore losers, she smoked you in that race and you know it." Seth joined in siding with me.

"Don't worry about it Seth, we all know who won the race. If they well pardon the pun cant run with the big dogs then they should stay on the porch. "

"Rematch."

"Stupid vampires so damn cocky."

"Hahaha, it's fine really I wont make you wear the dresses if your to chicken. I just never figured a werewolf for such a coward." I jabbed.

"Coward my ass!" Paul roared before turning and running off.

"Where is he going?" I asked.

"To see a lady about a dress just like those two." Jake laughed as Quill, Embry and Seth chased after Paul.

"I guess that leaves me, and you to ourselves for a few minutes." I smiled over at Jake as he picked up a rock from the ground and sent it skipping across the water.

I picked up a rock of my own and sent it soaring, it flew much further than I had intended before slashing the water and skipping off into the distance. "Guess I will need to learn my strength now before I am around people again." I mumbled.

"Bella, have you spoke to your father or mother at all since you left?" Jacob asked out of the blue.

"No." I said shaking my head.

"You dad was out here to see Billy last weekend, he said that he tried to call you again. He calls all the time, and Edward always gives some excuse as to why you couldn't come to the phone. Your shopping with Alice, your out sight seeing blah etc. blah."

"I didn't know that he called, I honestly haven't even thought of my parents at all. I guess I was preoccupied."

"Do you want to call them?"

"I.. What would I say? I don't even know if I can see them without.. Jake what if I hurt them?" I voiced my fears.

"Well I guess we need to find out just how in control you are before we take that chance. Let's go back to the Rez, and head over to the market. Its pretty much the only place in town that people hang out, and it will give you a chance to be around people."

Just on the edge of the market I could see the children playing in the street the mothers and fathers shopping or talking to friends. My feet were rooted to the ground refusing to move forward. I could hear the heart beats of each person like a drum in my head even from this distance.

"Jake I can't." I gasped out. Gripping his hand, and tugging him in the other direction.

"Just stay here for a minute, give yourself a second to adjust to it all."

We stood watching people live their lives, and I shortly found myself enjoying the warm feeling that came from seeing so many happy people. The pounding of hearts stopped being a taunt of what I would never have again, and slowly became a pleasure. Listening to those hearts made me smile knowing they all lived, and I cared that they stayed that way. I didn't want to hurt anyone, and that I cared not to could only mean that I wasn't completely the monster I feared I was.

"You ready?" Jake asked.

"Keep hold of my hand, and promise me that you wont let me hurt anyone. Promise! No matter what you have to do okay." I begged in earnest.

"I have faith in you Bell's." Jacob smiled at me his eyes looking straight into mine, and in that moment I stilled my resolve. I would not hurt anyone, I couldn't let him down.

We passed the day walking from vendor stall to vendor stall looking over the amazing wood working, and beading. I had always loved this place with the amazing colors. I looked down at my wrist with sadness at the naked flesh their. I had adored my gift from Jacob, and now it was lost forever. Edward had taken it long ago.

"I can make you another." Jake said noticing the focus of my attention.

" I am really so sorry about everything. I hope you know that."

"I know it, but lets stop with the guilt okay. If I was in trouble and came to you could you tell me you wouldn't do the same for me?" Jake removed my guilt with his honest words and I hugged him for them.

"Thank you Jake."

"Okay so lets head home, I am starving and then I have to patrol."

I sat in the living room watching TV while Jacob was out on patrol. Billy was sleeping in the recliner snoring loudly and drooling slightly. I really was enjoying this show, I felt like I could relate to this Damon character. He cared deeply for this girl, and fought what he was constantly. The take on vampires was far fetched to say the least, special rings that allowed him to live in the sun, witches. It was all over the top, and I loved it. I really loved this Caroline character even though she was completely self involved her relationship with that Tyler boy was to close to home.

"Shesh Bell's what are you watching that you don't even hear me come in?" Jake asked startling me as I leapt and ended up across the room.

"Oh shit Bella I am so sorry."

Once the fear left I roared with laughter. At the fact that I was a supposed to be the thing people where afraid of yet here I was huddled in a crouch in the corner.

"Vampire diaries Bella really?" Jake asked when I moved back to the couch.

"Shhh. Rose is very sick, I think she might die." I hissed at him before focusing again on the show.

Half an hour passed before the show ended with the death of poor rose and the tears in my eyes slowly faded. Looking over at Jacob I smiled at his sleeping form. While I had watched Jacob had helped his father to bed, and now I thought for a moment about waking him, and decided against it he would end up feeling obligated to keep me company if I woke him. So instead I moved quietly off the couch I turned off the T.V. What was I supposed to do for the rest of the night? This was never an issue before when I had been consumed with hunger. As soon as I thought it I felt the sting in my throat. Perhaps I should just go hunt. As quietly as I could I left the house and headed out into the darkness.


	5. Chapter 5

BPOV:

Hunting had given me a way to spend the night hours. I felt stronger still now that I was freshly fed. I'm not sure why I came here my feet had just carried me. Now I stood at the empty Cullen home staring at the house thinking of how different I had expected things to turn out.

I faced this house now, and found all fond memories tainted by the reality of my situation. Edward, oh how I hated him. The others, Alice I wonder if she knew I stood here now. If she cared that I was free of him.

"Bella."

Whipping around I faced the object of my musing. Her slight form pale in the moonlight, she stood alone her face searching mine.

"Is he here?"

"No, I came alone. I haven't seen Edward since I helped you escape." Her face held worry, as she slowly approached me.

"How could you let this happen to me Alice? You of all people should have known what would happen." I accused.

"Bella, I swear to you I never knew things would turn out this way. I saw a different future for us all. I never would have allowed him to hurt you had I known. I really do love you like a sister. That's why I helped you, once I found out what was happening I couldn't leave you like that."

"Do the others know?"

"I told them after I freed you. I ran before he got back, and let them know what had been happening. They suspected something when Edward always avoided letting us come see you. He continued to claim you were on your honeymoon, and didn't want to be disturbed the new happy couple and all."

"Yes, what a convincing little liar he is." The anger was stirring in my chest. Better than fear I guess.

"He is looking for you. He came to us after you got away. Asking if we had seen you. The others were furious Emmett attacked him, but Esme intervened . She is wanting to believe some good still lives in her son. Edward got away, otherwise Emmett would have killed him. They are all worried about you Bella."

"Yeah well you can tell them not to worry I am fine."

"So you went back to the wolves then." Alice stated.

"You can smell them huh. Yes I went to Jacob they have offered me safety."

"Bella." Alice grabbed my hands, "I swear to you we can keep you safe. Please just come home with me. I can teach you everything you need to know. I miss you."

"I am sorry Alice, but I cant do that." I grabbed her hands back looking into her auburn eyes, "Thank you for what you did Alice. I will never forget it. But for now my home is on the Reservation."

Hugging my dear friend I kissed her cheek softly. "Tell Em, that his little sis is sorry he didn't get to rip Edward apart. But that I appreciate the effort. Tell the others that I miss them as well, but that I cant come back.. Not now. And tell Esme, that she needs to wake up and face what he is. Stay in touch."

With that I turned my back on Alice heading toward my home.

JPOV:

When I woke it was to the banging of pots and pans, and the smell of bacon. Standing I stretched out the kinks from sleeping on the couch then followed my stomach to the kitchen. Walking into the room the first thing I noticed was the table loaded with food. Pancakes, bacon, eggs, biscuits and gravy. Bella was carrying a plate of toast with jam from the counter to join the rest of the food.

"Hungry?"

"Of course not. I just wanted to make myself useful, and I wasn't sure how much you ate." Bella pushed a strand of hair from her face smudging a streak of flour across her cheek. I smiled at the picture she made wearing my dads kiss the cook apron and her hair piled on her head falling from the loose bun.

"What?" She asked as I stared.

"You make quiet the sight in the morning." I walked over and sat at the table.

She opened the fridge and pulled out some fresh juice and poured me a glass. "Thank you." I said when she sat the glass in front of me.

She turned back to the job at hand cleaning the kitchen. While I sat down and made a plate of food. Everything smelled great and I was starving. I loaded up my plate and began eating my murmurs of Mmm seemed to please her as she giggled quietly each time I made them.

"Damn man, if this is what you get for keeping a vampire then I am going to get one of my own." Paul said as he opened the screen to the kitchen door and walked inside.

"Yeah good luck finding one like mine." I mumbled around the mouth full of biscuit.

"Good Morning Paul." Bella said as she brought him a glass, and a plate.

"Morning Vamp girl. Smells good."

Within minutes Paul joined me in murmurs of pleasure. Bella really was a good cook. I scooped out some blackberry jam and spooned it onto the fresh crumbling biscuit before taking a huge bite and moaning my pleasure.

"Mmm Hmm."

"Ohhh Mmman." Was Paul's response.

"Hey wheres ours?" Embry asked from the door as he came inside followed by Seth, and Quill.

"Here have a seat." Bella offered more glasses of juice and plates that quickly helped clear the platters of food. it's a good thing she didn't eat this stuff otherwise she would starve around here.

"Oh My God!"

"Sooo Good."

"Thank you Bella, its amazing." Seth said only the words came out Zank Eww Elaa Iz Maching. Tiny bits of biscuit flying from his lips.

Her laughter was followed by a soft, "Your welcome." Before she moved from the sink to hang the drying towel over the oven door handle to dry. "Jake."

"Huh." Was all I managed as I shoveled in my food.

"Can I borrow some more clothes I am going to jump in the shower."

"Waychels." I said best I could. She seemed to understand and nodded her head before walking out of the room.

As soon as she was gone it was less civil in the kitchen as we all fought over the last of the bacon. About three minutes later all the food was gone, and the shower turned on. Me, and the guys managed to delegate plate washing duty to the loser of Rock Paper Scissors. So as Embry washed the plates the rest of us went outside to sit on the porch.

"You work today?" Paul asked.

"Yeah, but only a half day."

"Patrol tonight?"

"Of course, but I think I will just have a quick run over the borderline. Its been pretty quiet so we should be able to cover it in an hour if there is no problems." I answered Seth.

"Should I tell Leah to meet us for patrol?" Seth asked with a grimace.

"No, I don't want to force her to come when we should be fine without her. How's she taking things?"

"She's pissed she hates not getting her way. But she will get over it, she takes her responsibility to the pack seriously."

"I know she does. Being the only female adds even more pressure making her think she has to be better and stronger." I grumbled pushing my hand through my hair.

Laughter caught my attention, as I whipped my head around to look into the kitchen. What I saw however didn't make me want to laugh. It made me want to rip out my friends throat. Bella was leaning against the counter her smile radiant as Embry reached over and lifted the strap from her sundress back up onto her shoulder.

I couldn't help the growl when he lightly brushed her skin. She smiled at him shyly before laughing again at his story.

"You should have seen us. I wont be making that mistake with you again. I will be lucky to ever get a girl now."

Bella smiled wider and reached out to touch Embry's naked arm right above his pack mark and I saw red. "Don't worry, girls love a sense of humor."

"Whats so funny in here?" I asked moving close to Bell's and between her and Embry. Giving him a look that spoke volumes as he stepped back with a quirked eyebrow.

"Oh. Embry was telling me all about the results of losing our bet. I wish I had been their to see it." Bella smiled at me as I moved closer to her feeling the need to crowd her until she could only see me. I ended up backing her into the corner of the fridge and the counter which earned me a strange look from the others.

"Jake, sheesh you get any bigger and I wont fit in the kitchen at all. Why don't we all go outside and talk. I think I need to hear more about last night from Embry." Bella moved around me grabbing Embry by the crook of his arm and leaning in to him.

"Whoa big dog." Quill said bracing his hand on my chest.

Shaking my head I took a deep breathe what had I planned on doing anyhow. Its not like this was a few years ago and I still loved her, and her me. Things were different now, and if she wanted to touch him.. No. Fuck that she didn't need to touch him, and he needed to get his hand off her waist before I fed him those fucking fingers.

"Jake! Man you are thinking of tearing your brother to bits. Take a breath and think about it. They are just talking nothing to get so upset over. We all used to flirt with her when she was human, and she never paid us any attention. I doubt that's changed now that she is a vamp."

I held the breath I took for the count of ten and let it out slowly. Quill was right, this was nothing. I needed to chill the hell out, she was a vampire now its not like I could have her even if I wanted... not now.

"No seriously Bella I took pictures with my cell phone I knew you would want to see this." Seth laughed as he scrolled through his phone showing Bella picture after picture as she laughed louder with each one.

"What are you showing her anyway?" I asked feeling out of the loop.

"I got evidence of the guys wearing dresses in town last night, dancing the Macarena."

His words and one look at those pictures and any anger I was feeling was gone.

BPOV:

I sat here one the front steps the sun shining, the guys laughing with me as they fought over who got to kill Seth and bury him in the woods to keep him from putting the pictures of them on youtube. I had missed this, the light hearted easy way they lived here on the res. Jacob's knee brushed my bare skin, and I pulled Rachel's sun dress down a bit from where it had risen up.

My leg tingled with warmth from the touch and I found myself staring at his naked leg. The muscle so prominent his skin so tan to my pale white. Fine hair coated his skin and I moved ever so slightly coming in contact as the hair tickled my flesh. He had changed. Not so much in looks, or attitude. Actually no, he was the same I had changed. Or my heart had, and to late. He couldn't want me now, but my heart tightened in my chest with longing before I caught myself.

I looked out across the yard, when I caught a noise in the distance. A sirens soft bloop bloop before it cut off. I was on my feet instantly, I knew that sound. "Oh god!." I gasped.

Charlie always clicked his siren on for the kids when he came here in his patrol car. What was he doing here. I wasn't ready for this. What would I say to him? Would he know? Should I tell him?

I wrapped my arms around myself as his car pulled into view. "Oh god." I whispered again.

"Bella I am so sorry I forgot that he was meeting dad today." Jake said reaching out to take my hand in his and squeeze it tight.

"Jake I don't think I can.. What.."

"Bella he loves you. He has missed you. I am right here." Jacob said as the other guys moved to stand close to me.

"Don't worry Bella we are all here." Seth said trying to comfort me.

Charlie stopped his car in the drive and opened the door. He stepped out slowly or it seemed slow in my head like he was moving through quicksand. Or maybe I was moving that way he looked at me his eyes lighting and a smile making its way across his weathered cheeks. He had aged in the three years I was away. More gray peppered his hair now.

"Bell's?"

"Dad." I answered back before he rushed towards me and I reacted.

Throwing myself into his arms I hugged him tight, hopefully not to tight and buried my face in his neck. I breathed in the smell of old spice and smiled.

"Whoa there Bella lets not suffocate him." Jake said pulling me back and looking at my dads neck and then judging my face and eyes. I wanted to punch Jake in the face for thinking I would bite my own father, but then again hadnt I been afraid I would do just that.

"Jacob Black, I haven't seen my daughter in three years she can smother me all she wants." Charlie said pulling me back in for a hug.

When Jacob's shoulders relaxed I smiled and moved back from my fathers arms to look at him. He looked good, even though he seemed so much older. I had missed him more than I had thought.

"I missed you dad."

"Oh Bella I missed you too." He said hugging me again this time with more force.

"Holy cow kiddo, you need to get inside your freezing. Why are you outside with wet hair your going to catch pneumonia. "

I laughed before I could stop myself. "I am fine dad honest." But he would have none of it, and we all went inside to sit in the living room, where I was wrapped up in a soft throw from the back of the couch.

"When did you get here? Why haven't you called?" My dad started in with the questions.

I hated to lie, and I wasn't sure I could lie to him if I tried. "I got back a few days ago. I am sorry I didn't call you. Coming here was kind of sudden."

"Is everything okay? Wheres Edward? Is he finally okay with you and Jacob being friends then?"

"Dad.."

"Bella left Edward." Jacob chimed in.

With that my dad looked at me closely this time, "Are you alright? Did he hurt you?" He seemed to be scanning me for marks or bruises.

"I am fine. Edward wasn't what he pretended to be, and so I left. I came to Jacob because I was confused and well it's the only place I could think to go… I knew Edward would look for me at home with you." Charlie gripped my hands and held them.

"Bella you can come home, we can get a restraining order in place to keep him away."

I snorted out loud before covering it with a cough. Just the thought of Edward showing up at my dad's me standing at the door a piece of paper in my hand holding it up as I attempted to repel him. "I don't think that would help dad you see Edward is.." I swallowed the dryness from my mouth. Trying to take things slow and think about what to say.

"Charlie, Bella can stay here with us. She's safe here, and you can see her as much as you want. I think she just needs sometime before she can tell us everything that has happened. But I swear to you sir I will protect her with my life." Jake spoke with honesty and conviction, but it didn't seem to be enough to convince my father.

"I think Bella should." He was cut off midsentence.

"Jake's right sir, with all of us here it would be crazy to think one skinny pale face stands a chance." Paul said standing to his full height he really was a sight all my protectors so big and strong preening like peacocks to appease my father. I almost broke into laughter. I fought to keep it in, only to see my own dad do it for me. Chuckling merrily.

"Well he does have a point, you boys are pretty damn big. I think your bigger since I was here last. I am going to have to speak to your parents about steroid use." Charlie laughed again and the tension of the moment was broken.

"Are you hungry dad? I could fix you something to eat."

"I am fine, I actually had plans to go fishing with Billy. Where is he at anyway?" Charlie asked, and I realized I hadn't seen him all morning.

**I hope your enjoying this story, I am struggling a bit with it. I don't have a set destination in mind. So please review and give me your thoughts. Thanks to all of you who are reading and reviewing. Tisa.. Xoxo**


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